Taking an Intuitive Approach to Life

I struggle with structure. Not because I don't think it's valuable or don't want it--I do. There seems to be a lot of benefit to a structured life, and, quite simply, I feel more accomplished when I have a routine I follow.

It's just hard for me to keep to a set schedule long term. Maybe part of it is that it gets monotonous and boring at times. My personality is a bit more fluid than not, and sometimes it feels like structure holds me back from something else that needs attention or that I'd rather be doing. But then it's easy to lose any rhythm once I start following whims, leading to feeling like a failure and giving up on my plans. Hence why I've made countless new schedules, lists and charts in my life, none that stick.

A painting I made this week has me thinking about the balance between structure and fluidity. I'm a part of a group on Instagram called Fluid Art Loop, which is a network of fluid artists. Each week there's a challenge to incorporate specific colors or themes into your art. I have done every single challenge since the group began because I love what the process teaches me and how it stretches me. This week I was given the colors of Imperial Blue, Yellow, Black and White (which honestly did not excite me). I hemmed and hawed a bit, but finally decided instead of just playing with the paint and seeing what would happen, I would try out a jellyfish piece with a technique I'd seen months before.

It went nothing like planned. I made my paint too thin, and the colors weren't moving on the canvas at all how I'd envisioned. I have yet to "scrap" a piece--I usually will keep working with it until I'm happy with it--but I was seriously tempted to give up on this one.

I didn't, though. Instead, I let go of my expectations and let the process flow. It ended up being an entirely abstract piece that reminds me of the beloved Vincent Van Gogh painting, so I'm calling it "Starry Night; Deconstructed." Even though it didn't turn out anything like planned, I really love it. It has a little bit of geometric pattern but a lot of bubbly, soft movement as well.

Sometimes it's better to take an intuitive approach to art in order to get the best piece possible, and sometimes it's better to take an intuitive approach to life, too. Instead of trying to force our life into what we think it should be, it's worthwhile to see it for what it is, take what colors and consistency we're given and have fun making it into the best version possible. I think the outcome can be unexpectedly beautiful. I feel that's so true for myself and all the imperfect situations and circumstances that come my way.

I'll continue to strive for structure, but trying so hard to also let priorities ebb and flow; trying to understand what needs my attention the most and what can wait. Then during those phases of calmness, I can get back to the structure and let it ground me to what's most important.

I continue to be so grateful for this journey with art and the lessons it teaches me and how it inspires me. The process has been priceless.